chapter seven
-Molly-

I sat on my bed for a long time after Sincerity had left. The last thing I needed was confusion with the opposite sex; and that most certainly was what I had. Will had never really paid all that much attention to me in other ways, other than friendship and Taylor was just an entirely different situation. I got off of the bed, crawled on my hands and knees; peered under the bed. I found my acoustic epiphone guitar finally and pulled myself on top of the bed. My guitar was something I had a deep love for. All of my guitars really. This was one of the many I owned. The wood was a deep dark blue shade. I positioned my fingers carefully. And I began to play an Garbage song, one of my favorites. I began to play and sing.

My fingers hurt when I was done. I shook my hand in the air and carefully set my guitar on the other side of the bed. I took a deep breath and sighed. "You really are good. I haven't had a chance just to see you play on your own." A voice sounded from the doorway and I nearly jumped out of my skin.

He was standing in the doorway, in an dark blue bathrobe, boxers and a white wifebeater. Taylor leaned against the doorway for a long time and finally entered, closing the bathroom door behind him. "Sorry. I was just getting out of the shower and I heard you playing..."

He was telling the truth. His blonde hair was still damp looking and his face freshly shaven. Even the damp boy smell. I sighed heavily. "Thanks. Its alright."

One of my weaknesses was not being able to show how I felt. It was always a bad thing. I just never knew how to fully express myself. I didn't know how to show anyone I cared. It's scary. You want to desperately show that you care, but you just can't seem to know how to show it. Its just so hard to... express. I've never been able to show anyone I care. Right then, I felt like an icicle. I had at least ten candles lit in my room, a definite fire hazard but Isaac was not going to allow us to use the power. I sighed again as he neared me. He had a slight smile glued upon his face. He sat next to me on the bed and then carefully took my guitar out of my arms. Damp boy scent filled my senses and I felt myself shake as his warm skin brushed by me. He positioned his fingers. I looked at him as I kept those thoughts, the thoughts of how I'm not good with people. I'm just not.

He began to strum slowly. I could feel his skin so near mine. His eyes met mine as he absent-mindedly strummed a little tune. "How long have you been playing Molly?"

"Nine years."

"I've been playing for four years now. You're pretty good." He smiled.

I watched him as he strummed and blushed wildly at the comment. "Thank you...you're not too shabby yourself." I remember the news of his divorce flying over the papers. Rumors had flown as well. His blue eyes were lowered as he strummed a tune. I didn't know exactly what to say. The words had suddenly left me. Was Sincerity right?

"Can I ask you a few questions?"

I recognized the tune as Mmmbop and stopped myself from laughing. "Sure. I'll answer them the best that I can." I drew my legs up on the bed and pulled them up to my chest. My arms wrapped around my knees and I rested my chin on my knees carefully. My eyes remained on his figure as he strummed some random tunes.

"What is your relationship with Will?"

I wanted to pass out. I want to pass out or fall to the floor convulsing and twitching. Maybe then I wouldn't have to answer. But I stared at the wall that projected our shadows against it, the candles flickering from all directions. He stopped strumming. "Are you okay?"

"He's just a friend. I adore him but I know I'd only get dreadfully hurt in the end," I replied after a long silence. I felt him shift beside me, he began to strum again. What was with people suddenly questioning my relationship with Will? He was plain out a sixteen year old male slut. He would probably eventually leave me after using me and breaking my heart. I wondered constantly if I wanted to take the leap and tell Will how I cared about him; but I never did.

"What do you think of me?"

Bloody hell.

It wasn't going to end and I had brought this on myself. He just continued to casually strum as I was going mad, going out of my mind and I looked very calm on the outside. What if he knew that I was going mad in my own mind as he asked me such questions? "I don't know you all that well. I can't really say. I didn't keep up with the media much over the past few years, I just know you are the second oldest of your family and you're divorced."

"Ah."

I wanted to lower my eyes, take my guitar back - have something to busy myself or concentrate on as he questioned me.

"Do you have a rubberband?"

My eyes flashed open. "What?"

"For my hair?"

I reached over to my nightstand to grab the nearest rubberband, without my legs moving from being pulled up to my chest. And his fingertips lingered up against mine as he took it, he kept his face close by and I felt my heart speed. He smiled lightly at me and took it. I stared as he pulled his hair into a low ponytail and his few infamous strands fell down, still damp. He continued to strum and then a tune kicked in. "Morning, day or night, I tremble at your sight - it's impossible to fight, I've tried. Now you're in my head and your mind i've read, could recite the words you've said, now I," he sang in a soft tone, the song slower than usual. He was playing the one song I knew. "Can't stop thinking about you, can't get you off my mind, no, I can't stop thinking about you all the time. Can't stop thinking about you I can't get you off my mind. No I can't stop thinking about you, I'm thinking about you all the time..."

Faint, was what I felt. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to move. He didn't look down at the chords as he played. Instead he was staring into my eyes fearlessly. And I was beginning to feel myself fall into the blue. After the song he just looked at me for the longest time. And I knew the look of surprise was on my face. He pulled the guitar strap off and set the guitar on my bed. Never had a member of the opposite sex ever sing to me personally. I scared them all off generally. Taylor pushed my knees down to my amazement and I was dumbfounded as he gave me a tight hug. Chills ran down my spin as he whispered goodnight in my ear while smiling faintly. And he was through our joined bathroom door and it closed.

My bedroom door did swing open only a brief second later. I saw Will's figure standing in the door way. "What the fuck was that?!" He asked me a little too loudly.

"What do you mean?" I drew my knees up to my chest slowly again and stared at Will confused.

"I mean that Hanson fag trying to get into your pants."

I stiffened. I hated the word, fag, and he knew it. I stared at him for the longest time. He came closer to me, just wearing a pair of boxers and a tank top. "I'm sorry Molly. I should know better. I guess I was just..." he sat down on the bed next to me, "Jealous."

He rested his head upon my shoulder comfortably and we both laid down together. I rested my head upon his chest and listened to his steady heartbeat. Without a single warning his hands touched my face, he drew my face closer and I could feel his breath against my lips. I felt incredibly faint. At the same time, I half hoped Taylor would have done that. But it was Will, the boy I was always in love with despite the ways he acted. I felt myself get lost in his kiss, he'd never bothered to kiss me before. Were my hopes and dreams finally coming true?

The night was a blur. My sister would divulge in details, but I don't care to give out the smallest of details out. Let's just say, he didn't leave my side all night long and took me to the heavens.

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